How To Get Rich
1.
Win lottery $
2.
Open a guitar store for sales, repair, building, soundproof rooms for playing, and appreciation
3.
Telephone store - they can only dial the weather, but at least you could try them first! AND Software store - not connected to network or floppies, but at least you could check out the software.
4.
Invent some cheap little plastic thing that everyone thinks they want, like the pony tail inverter
5.
Copyright and popularize new metric prefix. ex: "Those logs must weigh a few a heftograms at least!"
6.
Savvy international travel agency specializing in unspoiled cool places, and shattering illusions.
7.
Full-size air hockey with real people!
8.
Rollerblade/soccer
9.
Explain why photons are detectable at a distance (I mean, what are the odds?), copyright the lecture a la Feynman, and rent it out.
10.
Surround ourselves with unnecessary but fee-generating bureaucracy
11.
Develop and market a cable box that that lets you pick what channels are where, and ignore all others, and maybe even select them by acronym instead of translating (from tv guide: ch. 10 is NBC is RI-COX south ch. 16)
12.
Print our own money in useful denominations that people will want to use, thus giving it value. ex: $16 bills
13.
Make a basic convertible that handles OK, has OK performance, is easy to fix, and looks great at a resonable price.
14.
Chain of fully equipped auto repair bays with lifts, lease them out to home mechanics. (Corollary: insurance firm for liability insurance, and law firm for the obvious)
15.
Make Ed's hats. (anyone?)
16.
Chia-condoms
17.
Inherit beau coo $$
18.
License 867-5309 as a pay-per-call
19.
Marry a wealthy heiress
20.
Australian rules curling
21.
Space shuttle charters
22.
Rock skipping beach (like a driving range)
23.
Consultant
24.
Presidential Advisor
25.
FLIGORS (already taken - Martha's Vineyard)
26.
Velcro pajamas & sheets for parents of bedtime resistant kids. Maybe made of gallium to meet fire safety codes.
27.
Lotus|Magellan for windows - it has to work as well!
28.
Get really really messed up for a long time, recover, blame an outside source, make self-help tapes and write a book.
29.
Bottle springtime (heck, why not all four seasons? "Winter" for Bermuda?)
30.
Rent my airspace to NASA, FAA...
31.
Copyright our first names and charge lesser beings royalty fees
32.
copyright our initials and charge other people who insist on using them in THEIR copyrighted words (ex: don booth would get money from CaDBury chocolates)
33.
Patent the wheel, or fire
34.
Pencils made out of bones, like those stick ones
35.
Discover a surprisingly useful and profitable thing to do with an unlikely and disgusting source (ex: ambergris to perfume or tree pulp to toilet paper)
36.
Perfect the method of catapulting as transportation. There would be local and "hub" catapults, just like airports, and maybe big pits with soft balls in them (like the Discovery Zone) to land in. Or maybe they could be so well aimed like the dancing water fountains at Epcot. Whatever, monopolize and profit!
37.
Fill celebrity niche left by the late Eva Gabor
38.
Emulate tuition management systems
39.
Open-til-2AM pizza joint on Bowen's Wharf
40.
Pre-fab house modules, velcro-sealed for easy remodeling
41.
Enormous Lego to build real houses
42.
Every now and then ask people we know to "borrow" a dollar
43.
prosthetic thumb
44.
NEVER start a body part replacement mail order house
45.
Upgradable modular cars with licensing agreements, viz. PC's
46.
Buy low, sell high
47.
Invent a working transporter. Make money directly from it, or sell out for HUGE $$$$$ from trucking companies
48.
False human ears, so "your friends won't know you're a Vulcan." Great party gift!
49.
KITTY-KLEEN easy clean litter box
50.
Safety jumper cables with master switch
51.
Gloves with inside sponge and outside brillo
52.
Giant sports: croquet/billiards
53.
Indoors no out-of-bounds soccer
54.
Rollerblade Australian rules cement hockey
55.
Build circum-Jamestown underwater bike tunnel, charge tolls
56.
Buy a BIG wrench (maybe two), submit winning bid to dismantle Jamestown Bridge
57.
Claim abandoned oil platform as sovereign nation, charge huge tariffs
58.
Patent nested cylindrical periodic tables with spinning rare-earths and transition metals
59.
Copyright new English words (ex: "Xing" = want to but can't; and "Strow" = to throw randomly around a room) and charge royalties
60.
Patent grass, charge "per blade" royalty
61.
Football on huge vibrating metal plate, like the game when we were kids
62.
Sacrificial anodes for cars
63.
carbon-fiber ultra light table wear
64.
2 liter soda bottle pressurizer so last inch isn't always flat
65.
Geo-synchronous orbit satellite with long hose to home central vacuum cleaner. As strong as you can get - the power of deep space!
66.
Car phone speaker phones. maybe they have this?
67.
Giant parachutes for airliners plummeting to the earth.
68.
Same product line as #67: After emergency oxygen system is engaged, airplane cabin fills with non-flammable neoprene foam that completely encases all passengers and fills the entire cabin space. Passengers can be carved from the wreckage by rescuers, then hosed off with a solvent to release them.
69.
Hot air balloon that you can steer.
70.
Combine windsurfer with bicycle.
71.
Charge rent to every company that has a visible logo on your clothing.
72.
Mountain bikes with rocket/jet assist for uphill rides.
73.
Lightbulbs that change colors as their life dwindles (like those toothbrushes).
74.
Naked figure skating as an Olympic sport.
75.
Use Bose-Einstein Condensate to build modems so graphical web browsers can work at 300 Baud with 8088 computers, rather than letting them fill up valuable landfill.
76.
3-D LCD glasses as video "eye-phones"
77.
Start a chain of auto-repair garages staffed entirely by females, diercted at female customers, so there will be none of that faux-macho overcharging crap. maybe add $20 surcharge for every crude "lube job" remark.
78.
Lovingly crafted rare/hard-wood computer cases and components. Can you imagine a beautiful contoured cherry mouse? Awalnut keyboard?
79.
Plug and play automotive design. standard sizes for dash components, etc, with industry-wide protocol, and you could choose the dials/controls you want...
80.
Rent-a-gun. Hourly rates. Free ammo with every .45. Every night is Saturday Night Special!
81.
Hand forged nails/ Screws with lovingly carved thread made by old italian craftsmen.
82.
Take the acrylic polymer (redundant?) from a 3-d fabber and replace it with liquid candy and make CAD Candy, in all shapes and sizes!